What is my fucking problem with aliens?

I'm glad you asked!
As the quote famously goes:
“Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.”
― Arthur C. Clarke
This is a useful starting point. Humanity has a persistent dual problem of anthropocentricism, and the false assumption of similarity.
Human beings (naturally, being a social species) assume as a heuristic that everything is social, and is social like them. This is extremely useful for things like 'making new friends' and 'helping hitchhikers' and 'surviving the winter' and 'efficiency of thought'.
I, regrettably, am not as able to benefit from this heuristic behaviour as other humans because I have, to put it delicately, reached new heights of autism.
Humans generally do not think like I do and generally do not practice social behaviour like I do. I read science fiction showing the "green-skinned space babes" and their audible speech and bilateral symmetry and forward-facing eyes, and frankly, unrealistic as that is, it's just set-dressing.
Not a big deal. The unrealistic part is that they make friends the exact same way that humans do and that they follow educated, White, American, urban, (usually male and slightly autistic) conversational norms. Write what you know?
It doesn't take a long search to find a living being that is incredibly similar and closely related to humans that doesn't think like us. On a universal scale, we are extremely similar to bees.